In the past couple of days I`ve been roaming around this forum and I have noticed that a lot of guys ask themselves if size really matters. This doesn`t surprise me because most of my male friends are obsessed with this issue and only a few of them have had the courage of asking me this question face-to-face.
Being in my early thirties doesn`t make me a know-it-all but my experience counts, too and I can say that size…actually matters. It took me a very loooong time to understand that. I can remember my first lecture at the university of Linguistics and Literature. I was a freshman and I was attending the Phonetics class. The professor joked about allophones and morphemes and said “You know, size matters, even in Phonology”. We all laughed but I thought to myself “hey, I never thought of that, he`s not right, maybe he is in the mood for jokes so he can break the ice”.
For many years I felt very frustrated with most of my partners in bed and like a young girl that I was back then I blamed myself. “Maybe it is because of my lack of experience, maybe I AM the one who is not doing things right, maybe I am not that good looking…” A lot of dark thoughts clouded my reason and it didn`t dawn on me that the problem wasn`t just my lack of experience. When I dated a guy with a larger package things really felt different. I could actually get an orgasm and feel…I could actually feel…and I felt free to be myself and do a lot of things in bed because it just felt right and I stopped thinking that I was doing something wrong.
You can`t imagine how it must feel for a woman to feel unattractive or frigid or think she lacks experience. I think that my biggest mistake was that I didn`t acknowledge that a small penis may be a cause of me not feeling okay.
Here is where you guys make a mistake. And I don`t blame you at all because since you are born society or friends around you teach you in a subtle, psychological way to deny the facts and to accept that size doesn`t matter and that all will work out the way you want to and that the perfect woman for you will love you just the way you are. And some women have the bad habit of reassuring you that everything is okay when it is not for them…and that is an insult to the relationship, to you and to them.
I believe it`s more than this. I believe that your subconscious realizes that there is a problem and you start feeling awkward or angry and you don`t know the reason why and you blame a lot of things or persons but you don`t take a second to analyze your life and try to figure out the missing links.
Some of you acknowledge that size isn`t your plus and shrug your shoulders and say things such as “well, size doesn`t matter, it`s the way you use your penis that counts”.
Let me get some things straight. I have had some hard times with my boyfriend. He`s mainly one of the reasons that I`m here now, because I know what it means to be affected by size. We had a lot of arguments about it, we tried to place the blame on each other but at the end of the day we realized that a lot of factors contributed to the dead-end which our relationship was facing.
To a woman, size is important but to a man it is vital for his manhood. This is how we`re made, I don`t think it is okay to deny who we are and how we act. But I think we should do something about it. I think we are wrong whenever we do nothing, when we don`t act we won`t evolve.
My boyfriend wanted me to dump him and this is when I realized how much I loved him. I kept telling him that we can solve things out, that there must be a way to get past this issue but he wouldn`t hear me out. A lot of crying, a lot of raised voices, but I guess that each relationship isn`t a bed of roses, it requires work, commitment, dedication, effort and love to make things work out.
I think that not only the size matters-it is just part of the bigger image. You could be hung like a horse, but if you don`t give a damn about your girl or you don`t try to discover what she likes in bed or to hear her out when she tries to let you know what turns her on…then…the problem might be the ego or selfish nature…
My boyfriend tried everything. We searched the internet like crazy; he asked some of friends about “cures”, “treatments”. He really freaked out when he tried taking into consideration surgery for P.E and I did, too. It wasn`t natural and it had a lot of side effects that in the end would have made us even more bitter.
He tried a Chinese cure, something that had to do with some natural herbs but after this so called cure he got some weird skin allergy that got away after weeks of treatment and time wasted at the dermatologist.
We both ended up being frustrated. Now you may say that I don`t know how he must have felt like, but after years spent with someone under the same roof…you get to know him and somewhat (this is what love does to you, folks) his moods can be transferred to yours. You both influence one another via moods, words and many other things.
After a lot of internet searches, my boyfriend ended up using pumps and extenders. I wasn`t open to this option, thinking it is painful. My boyfriend told me that it isn`t, as long as you know the right “maneuvers”. Guess he`s a smooth operator, heh.
What did these pumps do for us? Well…sex lasts longer now and damn…it is hot. We both get pleasure out of it and all I can say is that size matters…you can only know that by means of comparison (a smaller vs. a bigger penis).
And it`s not just the size, guys. If a guy is happy about himself, it will show. The self-confidence that a man has makes everything be better. This self-confidence can be seen at work, in bed, with friends etc. I am so proud of my guy, he didn`t give up on himself, we both walk with our heads held high and the fights now are so rare and they mainly have to do with the cat or who`s cooking today (yeah, we both cook) or at which concert we should go.
I thought it would be hard for me to share these personal thoughts with you but I think you should hear a woman`s perspective, too.
I hate some of the women that I know who don`t support their men and let them live in deceit…they claim that size doesn`t matter at all, they act like goodie-two-shoes and then they make their men feel worse about themselves by comparing them with other guys from porn movies or by cheating on them.
That`s not the attitude a woman should have…and if your lady doesn`t support you all the way with your ups and downs…then you should reconsider some things…
Women have hard times with standards and sizes, too. Need I mention breast cups, breast pumps and push up bras or panties? So…it`s not easy for anybody but if you try out some methods and keep an open mind about things, a lot can be achieved and I`m talking about a lot of things-from the way you look to the decisions you have to make in life.