GoodLookingNerd

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I was going to originally going to post this as a comment to a thread of one brother who had some serious size anxiety but this has gotten too lengthy, deep and emotional. WARNING, I KNOW I have some major fucking disorder. This has been a problem for fucking ever and posting/discussing this may make me reach some sort of catharsis but I still know what I have to do. This is elaborated below. Hopefully this will resonate with some other sick brothers, make people feel better about themselves or whatever. I don't know.

I was originally talking to somebody but just copy and pasted.

I know with my stats, I am "above average":

March 2017 stats

BPEL 7.8 in.
MEG 5.0 in.

I too am a virgin and have severe body dysmorphia. I am 6'3, have some extra poundage right now due to an injury but workin on it. Usually I am very strong and athletic and have been told I so many times I am very good looking. Girls on my campus always give me a quick glance and for the ones who have enough confidence, they give me a smile and give me a seductive hello.

I am also one of the top students in my chemistry program and have a solid 4.0. I just recently passed my national exam with flying colors and have been told by my professors that they see me doing whatever I want to do in this world.

Even with all these characteristics and achievements, I believe deep down that I am not yet complete and am not the man I want to be. Due to, yup you guessed it, my penis. I feel like shit all the time and when a girl is giving me signals I know I am gonna be turning her down due to me feeling like I will not be enough. I have really high goals and having a large penis has been the apex of my goals ever since I was 17 and noticed that men who have large members really do have an advantage in this life. Physically and really, PSYCHOLOGICAL.

It pisses me off that I can do all these things in life and being that I am so attracted to woman, I may still come up short to a dude that my girl has been with. I could literally be a billionaire and do all these amazing things but the fact that a guy has some more girth and the girl I'll be with has had more sexual satisfaction makes me think I have failed. It is really ridiculous even as I type this out but this is how I think and I have had therapy several times about this but still at the age of 23 at this point, I believe in order for me to get rid of this mental barrier and truly reach my potential is to get to my goal 9x6.

I have also have high testosterone levels which makes being "patient" that much harder. I am finally being consistent with a routine and am giving my self until I am at the age of 28 to reach that goal. Otherwise, I know life isn't gonna be good because I will forever be thinking about this.

It sucks man. Yesterday I went to go get a haircut. I looked real shitty because my hair grew out past the point I usually let it grow because I have stopped caring how I looked. The woman, who was in her mid 30's and pretty attractive, when finished my haircut told me "Oh my god, you are really handsome! Yeah, you look like a completely different person." She kept trying to talk to me afterwards and then complimented me about about my height. I told her I had to go but was fully aware of the signals. I just walking to my car, and a group of young attractive females were approaching me. They were all giggly and talkative but as soon as I was passing them, silence. A couple of them looked and smiled at me and the others gave me a quick glance and just looked away for a quick second. This happens a lot. This is just recently.

Really bad and I know I am probably one of the biggest losers I fucking know and it really kills me inside, but in my mind there is something telling me I have to have at least have a 9x6 to have sex because when I look down, it looks small to me. I almost came close to having sex a couple times and might share those stories, if it is even necessary.

I really want to enjoy life but watching so much �naked people movies�, the media, having dudes overestimate theirs sizes due to similar insecurities, and listening to females talk about penis size, I am vastly prohibited in my physicality, mentality, sociability, and spirituality. I have two other threads, one on penile enlargement, and one on getting fit. I guess now I need to work on my mentality and this is most likely gonna be the most important one, cause man, it really is self limiting.
 
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There's sooooo much more than size involved in sex. With a 5.5 BPEL and 4.75 MSEG I've had women tell me they missed how good the sex was when we were together.

While you're worried about your size she's worried that her ass is too big/small or her breasts are too small/not shaped right or "omg I hope he doesn't think I smell bad" and any other number of things. If your only insecurity is penis size and needing to lose a few pounds then the average woman has got 20 insecurities for each of them (and maybe more).

There will come a day you will have sex and realize that it's not all about size. As I've gotten a little bigger I've noticed that I can give even more but I've learned what to do during sex. It's actually really simple. Pay attention to what she's doing. 1 nighters it's not as easy because you're figuring her out as you go. Once you get into a steady sexual relationship and learn her (and hopefully she's learning you) you'll have times where you think you're good for another 20 minutes easily but her orgasm causes you to have an orgasm and you can't fight it. There's no stopping it whatsoever. It doesn't matter if you've got 5" EL, 6" EL, even 8", you'll both collapse on each other and she'll be fully satisfied... with the exception of wanting it again.

Having not experienced sex yet I understand the hangups and not knowing if you're good enough makes it all harder. I'm not saying to run out and just have sex with the first girl you can but if you can drop your fear and give it a shot you will find out that you don't need to worry as much as you do.
 
cladre60;735721 said:
There's sooooo much more than size involved in sex. With a 5.5 BPEL and 4.75 MSEG I've had women tell me they missed how good the sex was when we were together.

While you're worried about your size she's worried that her ass is too big/small or her breasts are too small/not shaped right or "omg I hope he doesn't think I smell bad" and any other number of things. If your only insecurity is penis size and needing to lose a few pounds then the average woman has got 20 insecurities for each of them (and maybe more).

There will come a day you will have sex and realize that it's not all about size. As I've gotten a little bigger I've noticed that I can give even more but I've learned what to do during sex. It's actually really simple. Pay attention to what she's doing. 1 nighters it's not as easy because you're figuring her out as you go. Once you get into a steady sexual relationship and learn her (and hopefully she's learning you) you'll have times where you think you're good for another 20 minutes easily but her orgasm causes you to have an orgasm and you can't fight it. There's no stopping it whatsoever. It doesn't matter if you've got 5" EL, 6" EL, even 8", you'll both collapse on each other and she'll be fully satisfied... with the exception of wanting it again.

Having not experienced sex yet I understand the hangups and not knowing if you're good enough makes it all harder. I'm not saying to run out and just have sex with the first girl you can but if you can drop your fear and give it a shot you will find out that you don't need to worry as much as you do.

On Point!
 
People are too worried about themselves to worry about others!
 
doublelongdaddy;735797 said:
People are too worried about themselves to worry about others!

Sometimes yes.

We've got a double edged sword when it comes to knowing about sex in the last 20-ish years. Today's generation has the ability so learn so much more than our parents and their parents before we even have sex thanks to the Internet. It's good because anything you wanted to know is available.

It's also bad because you can develop those insecurities thanks to camera angles and unreal expectations.

20 years ago a friend of mine who was natually HUGE said he had no idea how big he was until he joined the Marine Corps AND someone pointed it out to him. He hung longer than I was hard (I was able to figure that out based on hand size when he picked up his megacock in front of me). If he was reaching adulthood now he'd be watching �naked people movies� and thinking "why are these guys so small?" or even with some of the "enhancing" angles "looks like I'm average."

Relax. Enjoy sex. It's a fuckload of fun. I've had some mid-sex questioning of size with some women and it resulted in them getting a super aggressive pounding, screaming orgasms, and a satisfaction in my head of "she may not think I'm huge but she won't forget that orgasm anytime soon."
 
There are times where my anxiety reaches an all time high and the emotional stress of this idea hits me really freakin hard. Especially when I go out and see all the honey's I could be bringing back to the house.

Right now I am not feeling any of that and am doing what I need to be doing. I really do want to achieve my goals though more for me than for the chicks I will be impaling in the near future. :)

Due to how society women's and men's appraisal for having such a characteristic, my confidence at times is directly linked to the size of my member. Not all the time. But when it is, it really is overwhelming and it obscures my thoughts heavily and is the only thing I can think of during those times. Starting this thread was really one of those times.

For now, I want to get down to my target weight and start working out again to get a good physique. Then keep hitting the PE and being consistent. Using the Bathmate and filling that thing up is giving me a sense of self confidence. It's kind of lame but seeing the potential from growing in that thing and becoming leaner is making me feel better about myself.

I think just by working on my goals and staying focused my education will keep the anxiety at bay. And when I believe I am ready to finally crack this shell of self limitance, then I will take the steps to finally start enjoying life. Sounds kind of lame, but that's how I am thinking at the moment. Might change along the way.
 
GoodLookingNerd;735836 said:
There are times where my anxiety reaches an all time high and the emotional stress of this idea hits me really freakin hard. Especially when I go out and see all the honey's I could be bringing back to the house.

Right now I am not feeling any of that and am doing what I need to be doing. I really do want to achieve my goals though more for me than for the chicks I will be impaling in the near future. :)

Due to how society women's and men's appraisal for having such a characteristic, my confidence at times is directly linked to the size of my member. Not all the time. But when it is, it really is overwhelming and it obscures my thoughts heavily and is the only thing I can think of during those times. Starting this thread was really one of those times.

For now, I want to get down to my target weight and start working out again to get a good physique. Then keep hitting the PE and being consistent. Using the Bathmate and filling that thing up is giving me a sense of self confidence. It's kind of lame but seeing the potential from growing in that thing and becoming leaner is making me feel better about myself.

I think just by working on my goals and staying focused my education will keep the anxiety at bay. And when I believe I am ready to finally crack this shell of self limitance, then I will take the steps to finally start enjoying life. Sounds kind of lame, but that's how I am thinking at the moment. Might change along the way.

I'm not telling you to go out and start having sex with every woman you can but you will learn so much, and possibly lose a lot of your insecurities, once you've had sex a few times.

Given your mental state if you're going to have sex with someone she needs to be a warm, kind woman. You don't want some bar slut who will bang just about anyone. You don't necessarily need to be in love with her but it should be someone you can be open and honest with. If you get lucky enough to find a girl who you can tell that you're a virgin before you have sex with her and she doesn't laugh at you or make fun of you then you're golden. Us guys, well we love the opportunities we've had to deflower a virgin because we know we were there first. Women do feel the same way. If you find one that is truly understanding of your virginity you are going to have some amazing times with her.

I'm telling you from experience though that making your penis huge and THEN learning how to use it might not be the best. I've gotten about an inch bigger since I started PE and it's just making sex even better. It's like having a race car and learning how to drive to its full potential and then upgrading it to the moon and beyond.

On top of that if you're truly huge there will be some limitations. You have to let them adjust to girth and length if you're beyond normal. I've had sex while still somewhat plumped up from a BM session and I had to start off slower due to the added girth. I only knew that because I already had experience and knew what I was doing.

I know 1 conversation isn't going to have you doing a complete 180 but I encourage you to take some steps forward. You may be missing out on some great relationships due to insecurities. It's not all about sex either. The feeling of knowing someone wants you around is nice and comforting. Start to step out of your comfort zone a little at a time and you may find that these things are much easier than you thought.
 
Clad, You are a bright Brother!
 
cladre60;735857 said:
The sad part is I can help others yet my own life is just fucked. Go figure lol.

I found much freedom and peace by helping others. Eventually I was able to apply the advice I was giving :)
 
doublelongdaddy;735921 said:
I found much freedom and peace by helping others. Eventually I was able to apply the advice I was giving :)

I just need someone to do the things for me that I say need to be done to fix my life. That'd solve my problems lol.
 
cladre60;735943 said:
I just need someone to do the things for me that I say need to be done to fix my life. That'd solve my problems lol.

It's the power of perspective and context...far easier to identify and suggest cures from afar. can't see the forest cuz the trees are in the way, type thing
 
Big Schwanz Acht;735949 said:
It's the power of perspective and context...far easier to identify and suggest cures from afar. can't see the forest cuz the trees are in the way, type thing

Oh no, I can see the things that are wrong and need fixing. Just seems like the mountain of them is too high to climb, too big to go around, and too massive to bulldoze down with just 1 of me. I need 6 of me. 5 of me to do the work and 1 to supervise.

It'd end up like the movie Multiplicity though where they would all end up taking turns on my wife and wearing her out. Then I'd try to have sex with her and she'd be exhausted.
 
Big Schwanz Acht;735969 said:
any way you can whittle-down your 'mountain' into a series of 'mole-hills'?

Yes.

C4.

Wrecking ball.

Bulldozer.

Mass grave.

And a dump truck full of money.

Lol.
 
cladre60;735972 said:
Yes.

C4.

Wrecking ball.

Bulldozer.

Mass grave.

And a dump truck full of money.

Lol.

K...let's try a different approach. What if you were atop the mountain? Is the view better, or is there just more crap to see? Would an influx of $'s solve this or is it more 'family' issues? The good thing about money, is that you can always go and make more...just up to you...if it's people/family, that's far more complicated and fluid
 
Big Schwanz Acht;735992 said:
K...let's try a different approach. What if you were atop the mountain? Is the view better, or is there just more crap to see? Would an influx of $'s solve this or is it more 'family' issues? The good thing about money, is that you can always go and make more...just up to you...if it's people/family, that's far more complicated and fluid

It's complicated with lots of moving parts. There's some mental road blocks too. It's actually similar to what's going on that started this thread. A lot of times when you have failed repeatedly you realize that you don't get let down if you don't try. Just gotta get over that part and things can start moving again.
 
Big Schwanz Acht;735999 said:
we're our own worst enemy...just wait till you hit 50 (LMFAO)

Indeed we are!
 
Big Schwanz Acht;735999 said:
we're our own worst enemy...just wait till you hit 50 (LMFAO)

If I can't accomplish the insanely short list of goals I've set for the time I turn 45 I won't even give a shit about 50. The list keeps getting shorter every 5 years. I can't shorten it any further.


Sorry for hijacking your thread GLN but as I'm sure you can see many of us are in the same boat. It's name is Life Issues and Insecurities. You are not alone sir, not in the slightest.

Anyone know where the paddles are to this boat? I'm still trying to fix the engine and if someone doesn't paddle the current well keep pushing us away.
 
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